Friday, January 4, 2008

1.4.2008

Blah. I hate being sick.
Another sick day. No fun at all. At least Lucy’s feeling better. Hmmmn. There are lots of things on my mind. Recipes that include beans. Geneology. Friends with whom it’s hard to be friends because of their gender. Friends with whom I'd like to spend more time. New friends. Blogs. Boring blogs. YouTube. This *badword* blogger editor that changes all of my double spaces (between sentences) to single spaces. }:L

I could go on forever.

Brian has taken Lucy to a party in Oakley. I would have gone, but I am sick. (Did I mention that I’m sick?) This means that I have the night to myself. Its a relief, frankly, to have no one to take care of but myself once in a while.

I am sitting here typing and taking great bites of salad. (See Resolutions)

Hmm. It just occurred to me that I haven’t mentioned Flowrider. It was lots of fun and it was too short and I am old and it made me extremely sore. In a nutshell. There was one thing that I was disappointed with last night, and that was that James and Jami weren’t able to participate fully.

I guess James got off work late and this pushed back their schedule enough that they got to Ogden late and little Alex wasn’t having the hang-with-Dad-while-Mom-rides bit, much less the sit-with-this-non-mom-while-both-parents-have-fun-without-you-bit. Jami tried the Flowrider 2 times. And James got in for maybe 30 minutes. Call it selfishness, I really, really wanted them to be able to "play" with all of us...

…I guess if having a child means anything, it means sacrifice. It should mean sacrifice. …And it depends upon the child and his or her parents as to what sacrifices end up being part of child rearing. **If anyone happens to read this and has kids and determines that she or he has not made any sacrifices, best not let me know. I might just think you are maladjusted or less than intelligent.

It’s funny, when Brian and I let our good friends know that we were pregnant, one comment we got was that our friends were afraid that our friendship “wouldn’t be the same.” Brian and I didn’t quite know what to make of that. To Lucy’s credit, our lifestyle hasn’t really changed that much. We take her most places with us, excepting movies, and she does great. Sure, she requires lots of attention, so we don’t get many chances to get deeply involved with other things while she’s with us, but that’s what babysitters are for, right? We are hoping that Lucy won’t be our only child and fully expect things to get more complicated and difficult if we do have more, but for now, things aren’t too different.

It is windy tonight. Its dark out, but I can still see the shadows of the trees silhouetted against the backdrop of valley lights. Its like there are three angry men standing at the base of every tree, shaking them for all they’re worth.

Reality check: I worked before we had Lucy, I was not at home all day reading books to her, changing diapers, feeding, bathing, dressing or cleaning up after Lucy. Things have changed a lot for me. Who am I kidding?

She is fantastic, though. This afternoon she suggested that we make cookies for Daddy. Smart and altruistic. She knows very well that making cookies involves butter, sugar and chocolate—all things she loves to eat—and that the cookie dough is more than just edible.


We watched part of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix this afternoon in French. After a while, she looked at me with a smile on her face and started speaking French to me. Of course, these were not intelligible phrases, but the sounds that she was stringing together were distinctly French. We have some books around the house that happen to be in French and she’s not shy about trying out the different words. The last one I read to her was a translation of “I Love You Forever.” In the book, one repeated phrase is "grew, grew, grew." In French its “grandit, grandit, grandit…” It took me a second to realize that she was quoting this with gusto after a few pages.

Its crazy to watch her grow so fast, and fascinating to watch her language skills develop.

Enough typing today. I’m going to go be sick.